How to Interest People

Key Concepts

  • Engaging Through Shared Interests: Effective communication involves speaking about topics that resonate with the other party's personal interests. Highlighting examples from influential figures like Theodore Roosevelt and successful business people, the chapter shows how understanding and engaging in other's passions can significantly ease and deepen interactions.

  • Case Studies Demonstrating the Principle:

    • Theodore Roosevelt: Prepared for discussions by reading up on subjects his guests cared about, crafting conversations that were both engaging and personalized.
    • Edward L. Chalif: Secured significant funding and support by focusing conversation on a subject his benefactor was passionate about, before introducing his own request.
    • Henry G. Duvernoy: Shifted his sales strategy to discuss the personal interests of a hotel manager, leading to successful business engagement after years of unsuccessful attempts.

Practical Advice

  • Identify and Leverage Interests: Before important meetings or interactions, research and prepare by learning about the other person’s hobbies, passions, or professional interests. This preparation shows respect and attentiveness, qualities that can turn potential transactions into meaningful relationships.

  • Conversation Starters and Engagement: Use the other person's interests as a springboard for conversation. This strategy not only breaks the ice but can transform formal interactions into enjoyable and memorable experiences.

  • Long-Term Relationship Building: Continually engage with key interests of your peers, clients, and colleagues. Maintaining interest in their passions fosters ongoing positive relationships and opens doors for future opportunities.

Examples from the Chapter

  1. William Lyon Phelps Experience: An early lesson on making conversations pleasant and memorable by focusing on the other person's interest, even if it was not shared.

  2. Business Strategy of Edward E. Harriman: Successfully securing a job by aligning his proposal with the business leader’s goals and interests, showcasing strategic adaptation to the interests of influential individuals.

  3. Personal Success Story in Sales: Duvernoy's transformation in approach from self-centered persistence to client-centered conversation, illustrating the shift from disinterest to engagement.

Principle to Follow

  • Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests. Adapting conversations to focus on what others find important not only enhances communication but also builds stronger, mutually beneficial relationships.