If You Must Find Fault, This Is the Way to Begin

Key Concepts

  • Effective Criticism Strategy: Using praise before addressing faults can create a conducive atmosphere for discussions and improve receptiveness. This approach softens the impact of criticism and helps maintain the individual's morale.

  • Importance of Tactful Communication: Leaders should use diplomatic language when pointing out areas that require improvement, to prevent damaging self-esteem and morale. Highlighting good traits before discussing issues can be more motivating and encouraging.

Practical Advice

  • Use Praise as a Preemptive Tool: When you need to point out a fault or a mistake, first acknowledge what the person does well. This sets a positive tone and shows that you value their overall contributions, making them more open to constructive feedback.

  • Diplomacy in Delivering Feedback: Always frame feedback with consideration for the other person's feelings. Choose words that are respectful and that recognize the person's strengths, even when addressing shortcomings.

Examples from the Chapter

  1. Calvin Coolidge's Method: Complimented a secretary before pointing out a mistake in her work, using personal praise to ease into criticism.

  2. President McKinley's Handling of a Speech: Praised a speech before suggesting it was unfit for the occasion, encouraging revision without discouraging the speaker.

  3. Abraham Lincoln’s Letter to General Hooker: Started with compliments on bravery and professionalism before addressing serious concerns and misjudgments, maintaining respect while clearly communicating expectations.

  4. W.P. Gaw’s Approach with a Subcontractor: Engaged in friendly conversation and praised the subcontractor’s work and heritage before addressing the delay in delivery, which resulted in compliance without direct conflict.

  5. Dorothy Wrublewski's Leadership: Praised an employee’s strengths before assisting her in improving her skills where she struggled, enhancing both confidence and performance.

Principle to Follow

  • Principle 1: Begin with praise and honest appreciation. Starting interactions by acknowledging positive attributes sets a constructive tone for addressing any areas of improvement, fostering a more receptive and positive environment.